Whether your senior loved one is having difficulty completing everyday tasks or you feel you can no longer fulfill the role of primary caregiver, home care is an option that not only allows your loved one to maintain as much independence as possible but also gives you peace of mind knowing he or she is safe.
Broaching the topic of outside assistance with an aging parent or loved one, however, can be a difficult process. The thought of a stranger coming into one’s home can sometimes seem overwhelming and result in resistance. When initiating this type of family discussion, it’s important to choose your words carefully, the goal is to have a dialogue, not to dictate the solution you believe is best for your parent. An open, honest conversation will help your loved one recognize the potential need for in-home care and understand how it can positively impact his or her life. Consider the following tips.
Observe & Research
Perhaps you notice your mom has recently had difficulty climbing the stairs, or Dad has vision problems that have resulted in unsafe driving practices (e.g., drifting into other lanes, not obeying road signs). In any case, it’s important to observe any limitations so you can accurately discuss your concerns with your parents and find the best solutions.
Hiring professional in-home care is one of the best ways to ensure your loved one enjoys a high quality of life. Homecare experts are available to provide high-quality care to seniors on an as-needed basis. From assistance with mobility and exercise to providing transportation to the doctor’s office and social events, there are a variety of ways professional caregivers can help your aging loved one continue to live independently.
Evaluate Receptiveness & Show You’re a Resource
Probe lightly during a visit or over the phone (e.g., “When was your last doctor’s appointment? What did he/she say?” or “Did you drive to the mall today? How’s the car?”). If your parent is receptive to your questions, ask how you can be helpful. You want to be respectful and establish yourself as a resource, so avoid phrases like “That’s not good. We’ll have to do something” or “It’s definitely time to bring in a caregiver or move you to a facility.”
Set the Tone
Let the conversation flow naturally. Ideally, your parent will bring up the topic of assistance, but in most cases, you’ll have to start the dialogue. You can do so directly (e.g., “It was scary when you almost tripped on the steps this morning. Is that happening often?”) or indirectly (e.g., “Lisa’s parents just hired a caregiver to come in three times a week. Her mom is thrilled to have help with housekeeping and cooking, and now she can spend more time gardening and playing with the grandchildren”). Communicate your concerns, but avoid taking a critical approach, as it will likely end the dialogue.
Be Receptive
Do your parents prefer to age at home? What are your parents’ concerns about aging? What’s most important to them? Practice empathetic listening to show you support their opinions. If your parent isn’t open to discussion around additional assistance, try to get to the root of the resistance (e.g., cost, invasion of privacy, loss of independence, fear of theft) and ease his or her concerns (e.g., “There are many agencies that conduct thorough background checks on caregivers so we can make sure they’re trustworthy” or “Caregivers won’t take away your independence by doing everything for you but instead will only offer help when needed”).
Though you may be researching multiple agencies that provide elder care, Assisting Hands® Dana Point has much to offer your family and your elderly loved one. We are leaders in the senior home care industry, offering hourly and around-the-clock assistance from reliable, experienced caregivers. Trust Assisting Hands® Dana Point to help your loved one enjoy a happier and healthier life in the golden years.
Consider Bringing in a Third Party
If your loved one is totally resistant to the options you’ve put forth, sometimes it can be helpful to bring in a neutral third party. If your parent has always sought counsel from a priest or rabbi, for example, consider asking if that person could address concerns and suggest options.
Follow Up
Maybe you’re only able to introduce the possibility of home care and your parent needs time to think about it. Respect your loved one’s choice and allow time to digest all of the information you talked about, the final decision should be collaborative.
Aging in place can present a few unique challenges for older adults. Some only require part-time assistance with exercise or meal preparation, while others are living with serious illnesses and benefit more significantly from receiving around-the-clock at-home care. At Assisting Hands® Dana Point are leaders in the elderly in-home care industry for good reason. We tailor our care plans based on each senior’s individual needs, our caregivers continue to receive updated training in senior care as new developments arise, and we also offer comprehensive care for seniors with Alzheimer’s, dementia, and Parkinson’s. Rely on the professionals at Assisting Hands® Dana Point to provide high-quality compassionate care for your loved one.
Assisting Hands® Dana Point, is a California based, State Licensed, non-medical, home care agency, that services the cities of Dana Point, San Clemente, Capistrano Beach, Laguna Niguel, San Juan Capistrano, Rancho Mission Viejo and Ladera Ranch. If you or a loved one is in need of in home care, please call (949) 426-7300 for additional information or to schedule an in-home consultation or click “Schedule a Free Consultation” to submit your request online.
